A great idea for cologne...

The Vegetarian

To paraphrase Kramer from Seinfeld, "You spray it on and you smell just like a vegetarian".

According to the report, vegetarians not only smell better but also "taste better"! Too bad, we can't double-check with Hannibal. But, this is true, Hannibal is indeed reputed to have a very refined and discriminating collection of colognes. Convenient coincidence? Maybe so, maybe no. Also, the footnote in the report adds, "vegetarians have more stamina and energy in the sack".

Hmmm... most Indians being vegetarian, it is only now that I realise what Naipaul truly meant when he wrote, "India(ns) is an assault on the senses".